Almost all the answers.

  • I want to play on the Lunch League. I run pretty fast and have good hand-eye coordination. When are tryouts?

    Lunch League is not an actual sporting league. Though we admire your quickness and think you'd be totally sick at broomball.

  • What payment methods does Lunch League accept?

    Visa, Mastercard, American Express, Russo-Baltique vodka.

  • Can I make a change to my order once it has been placed?

    If you contact us before your order has shipped, we can make changes to or cancel your order. This does not apply when you mistake an oatmeal cookie for a chocolate-chip cookie. You should have been paying attention.

  • What if an item is out of stock?

    Don't worry, we'll let you know when we expect to have it back in stock before charging your credit card. That way, you can decide if you still want to purchase the item.

  • I'm really hungry. What do you recommend?

    Heat your oven to 400 degrees Farenheit. Butter a 3-quart baking dish. Cook a box of elbow macaroni and drain it. Melt 5 tablespoons butter in the pasta pot, add 1/2 cup all-purpose flour once the butter is melted. Stir until your arm hurts (roughly two minutes) and don't let it get dark. Then slowly add 6 cups of whole milk. Cook, stirring once in a while, until it's thick. That's about 6-8 minutes. Add 2 cups grated Gruyere, 1 1/2 cups grated Cheddar, 1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper, and 1 1/2 teaspoon salt. Cook until the cheese is just melted, than throw your cooked pasta in there. Mix the whole shebang up. Plop the cheesy pasta into your greased baking dish, and bake until golden brown and delicious, which is about 25 to 30 minutes.

  • How much is shipping?

    We offer $7 flat rate shipping to the lower 48. It's $16 for our friends in Alaska and Hawaii. (5-10 business days)

    Express shipping is $17. We don't currently offer express shipping to Alaska, Hawaii, U.S. Territories, P.O. Boxes, APO or FPO addresses. (2-3 business days)

    Orders typically ship the next business day, but please allow up to two business days to verify payment and process your order.

    If an item is out of stock, we'll let you know when we expect to have it back in stock before charging your credit card. That way, you can decide if you still want to purchase the item.

  • Do you ship internationally?

    At this time, we don't accept orders outside the United States. Come visit Tucson and we can hook you up!

  • Do your items actually come with lunch?

    Regrettably, no.

  • What is your Return Policy?

    We want you to be cross-eyed with happiness after receiving your purchase. If not, no worries. You may return or exchange an item within 30 days, provided it is unworn, unwashed, and devoid of spilled condiments. Unfortunately, shipping charges are not refundable. When returning an item, let us know how you'd like us to handle your return, and include a copy of the packing slip provided with your original purchase. If you're exchanging an item, we provide complimentary standard shipping on the new item.

    If you receive a defective or damaged item, you must notify us within 10 days of receiving it to be eligible for a return. If it has been more than 10 days, we will only accept items at our discretion. If a product is defective or damaged, a new product will be shipped to you at no additional charge, and you can make fun of us.

    Lunch League is not responsible for any return shipping charges or if your package is lost by your carrier, so we suggest tracking and insuring your package.

    Returns should be mailed to: Lunch League, 439 N 6th Ave. #101, Tucson, AZ, 85705.

  • How do I know if my return has been processed?

    Returns can take 1-2 weeks to be processed once we receive them. Be sure to also factor in the ship time for your return to be delivered to us. When your return is processed, we’ll shoot you an email. If you’ve twiddled your thumbs into oblivion, call us or send up a flare. We’ll tame your terror.

  • Will you design some threads for us?

    Sure thing. We like to craft witty, forward-thinking garments and other goods. What's more, we can customize any of our existing clothes for your event or enterprise. Just say the word.

  • Does Lunch League sell wholesale?

    If you have a store and want to stock our stuff, email or call us and we’ll talk details. No more smoke signals, please. They’re aggravating our allergies.

  • How do I know my online payment is safe?

    Protecting your information is our highest priority. Lunch League uses Authorize.net for payments. All purchases are transmitted using Secure Sockets Layer (SSL) encryption technology. That's like an extra lobster bib for you credit card.

  • What is your Privacy Policy?

    The Internet can be a pretty shady neighborhood, so Lunch League takes your privacy very seriously. We will not rent or sell your name, address, email or any other personal information to any third party or organization. That would be lame.

    Lunch League uses your information to process your order, and may use it to keep you informed about new Lunch League products, sales and other updates. We use Authorize.net for payments. All purchases are transmitted the Secure Sockets Layer (SSL) encryption technology.

    We will never request your user name, password, credit card or any other information through email. This practice, called "phishing," is a scam designed to steal your personal information. Super bogus. If you receive an email that looks like it is from us asking for your personal information, do not respond. And let us know, so we can use our superpowers to track the bad guys down and kick their asses.

    Lunch League is not responsible for the content of linked sites or sites referenced in blog posts.

    We may modify or add to this policy, so encourage you to review it periodically.

  • What's your favorite way to fold a shirt?

    Fold? Are you out to lunch? We keep our shirts on wooden hangers, to properly preserve panache. When packing for travel, we roll them up. Its the way our elders taught us, and its the way we’ll teach our children. We suppose you could fold your shirts, but we don’t have any particular technique for that sort of thing.

  • Need more help?

    Feel free to call or email us with any questions. We love the attention.